missing something

I feel as if im missing something
something ive gained
and have worked so hard to get..
..
this faith
that ive worked at, read for, prayed for
longed for
a long time, has been slipping

Why?

because im not with the same kids anymore
because i dont have the drive to go to mass anymore

Im doing the bare minimum here and it shows. I ger angry easier now, more sad about things that never used to bother me. I feel tired and broken down.

I went to mass tonight, the first time in a long time...and Fr. Bekehs homily was, as always, a dagger to the current events in my life.

Make God First
Pray with God for help
Reach your full potential with God.

I was there once...
at the peak of my faith journey
so strong and filled with Christ love.

I feel as if i've lost all of it..

{sigh}

I have not given up hope, i will get back there, just gotta start from the ground up again i guess....
start praying again
reading again
listening  again!

 everything again, how'd i let my self get here! Again?!!

good grief indeed, it is good grief